Do you often find yourself justifying the decisions you make to others?
Do you spend too much of your valuable time and energy anticipating the arguments that are going to come from just living your life?
There seems to be an explanation around every corner.
But I only did it because…
And I was just trying to…
No, no, no, what I meant was…
Wait! Let me explain!
If you’re anything like us, you probably spend a lot of time explaining yourself, justifying your actions to others as if you were in a court of law.
But the people who require an explanation probably won’t understand you anyway. You can’t control what they think.
And the people who really understand you—the important people who are closest to you—don’t need any explanation at all. They already get you, because you are enough.
Sometimes it makes sense to explain yourself—when someone misunderstands, or when you hurt someone accidentally. But most often the only person who needs an explanation is you so you can ascertain, accept, and work through whatever is on your mind.
Here are few simple ways to stop explaining yourself:
- Learn to trust yourself
Trust is often the underlying issue when it comes to feeling the need to explain yourself. If you learn how to trust yourself, then you won’t have to worry about explain your choices or actions.
Not only will you feel better about yourself, but it will also be less stressful to stop looking for approval from other people all the time.
- Stop overthinking
Its easy to get caught up in the endless cycle of overthinking and explaining yourself. However, it can be damaging to your mental health if you constantly ruminate on what other people think of you or how they might react to something you do.
Take a deep breathe and let go of any expectations you have for how others should perceive your behaviour.
- Be okay with being misunderstood
There will be times when people misunderstand your action or intentions, but that’s okay.
Its impossible for everyone to agree all of the time, and it’s important to be okay with that fact. People will disagree with you no matter what you do, so don’t let it bother too much.
- Accept that people will have their opinions
People are entitled to their opinions, even if they don’t agree with yours. Accept that fact and move on. There is no point in getting onto arguments with people over things that you cannot change.
- Know that you don’t have to please everyone
You will never be able to please everyone, no matter how hard you try. People are going to disagree with your decisions and opinions, but that doesn’t mean that you should feel the need to explain yourself.
- Be confident in your choices
If you are confident in your choices, then you will not feel the need to explain yourself to others. Trust your gut and make the choices that are right for you, even if others do agree with them.
- Don’t feel the need to justify your actions
One of the main reasons why people feel the need to explain themselves is because the feel like they need to justify their actions. However, you should never feel this way. You are the only one who knows what is best for you, and as long as you are not harming anyone else, you should not have to explain yourself.
Today if you’re tempted to justify your emotions, remember: You can’t control what other people think. But if you can accept yourself in this moment, you may discover what you need to do to feel better–instead of just trying to look better.
